Honouring love, kindness and grief with Em Melrose

Stories can help soften the edges of loss and grief in places where people might find that words fail them. Em Melrose’s chapter, Honouring, in the collaboration book ‘Untold and retold’, does exactly that. It is a courageous exploration of grief, love, legacy and the quiet, practical kindness of preparing those we love for a world without us. This chapter, Honouring, is an invitation to speak about death before it arrives, to share wishes before silence takes over, and to offer those we leave behind a final act of care. It's a difficult conversation, but one where Em has resolved to open more doors.

Writing from lived experience and love

Em’s decision to take part in the Stories that heal collaboration came from a deeply personal place. As she shares, “I have always said that I would love to write a book about my lived experience of walking beside my late husband with his cancer. This was a lovely way to experience writing and gain from the support of a community.” The short story format enabled her to create something meaningful without having to tell her entire story all at once.

Instead of centring on illness or loss directly, Em chose to write a descriptive piece about the feelings of the ones left behind. “It’s a fictional story about a widow who writes a letter to her loved ones to be read once she has died to help them navigate life beyond her.”

The result is quiet, human, and deeply considerate — much like Em’s professional approach to her work as a celebrant and coach, enabling personal and team growth.

Opening up the difficult conversations

As a funeral celebrant, Em works with that life-changing threshold where loss and grief become the central characters in a life story. She listens deeply, gathers fragments of memory, love and laughter, and weaves them into a service that honours the person who has died, while supporting those who remain. For many families, death arrives carrying not only grief, but confusion, uncertainty and unspoken questions. What did they want? How should things be handled? Are we doing this “right”?

The idea behind Em’s chapter is simple and important. When we lose a loved one, there is so much to do. She says, “I help others to have the difficult conversation about death, and reach clarity about their wishes, doing so in a way that is compassionate and supportive.”

The reader she had in mind reflects this practical tenderness. “My reader will probably be aged 30 plus years, who wants to ensure that they, and their parents, have laid out their wishes for their loved ones.” 

By writing the letter at the heart of Honouring, Em shows how clarity can become a final gift. She highlights how something as simple as a letter of wishes can support bereaved families at a time when decision-making feels almost impossible. This is about love in action and the story affirms just how powerful it can be to ease the emotional load for those left behind.

Storytelling as a sacred service

Em’s relationship with stories began early. She remembers loving Enid Blyton, the Famous Five and later Judy Blume, and the way you can get lost in a book. That sense of immersion, of being carried somewhere else, now shows up in how she creates and holds space for others.

She realised that storytelling would be part of her healing work when she went on her training, “When I embarked on my coaching as a celebrant, my time was spent with families holding space and listening to the memories and joy shared with loved ones. Each service is a story in its own way.”

This way of working is mirrored in her coaching work too. “The foundation of my background is working with individuals and teams, enabling personal and team growth by helping people recognise the stories they tell themselves,” she explains, as she is trained in personal development and leadership coaching. Alongside this she practises Havening, and Reiki energetic healing. It’s a blend she describes with warmth and humour: “Some people imagine I have a ‘Mary Poppins’ bag of tools and resources to use.”

She’s quick to address the misconception that it’s woo woo!! because her work is firmly grounded in being present, offering compassion and meeting people exactly where they are.

Holding space with kindness

Across Em’s work, one theme repeats quietly and consistently: kindness. “Holding space and listening are critical,” she says. These aren’t techniques to be applied, but ways of being, especially in moments of grief.

Outside of her professional life, Em enjoys movement, spirituality and nature. She finds that going to the gym keeps her physical body in check, and being part of a spiritual group or being by the sea or up in the mountains offers restoration, as she calls it, “Soup for the soul!”

When asked what inspires her now, her answer is beautifully simple: “Acts of kindness, in fact any love and kindness are at the heart of life, even when being kind can be tough.” That honesty gives her work its authenticity; instead of being sentimental, it’s intentional. And it mirrors the advice she would offer her younger self if she could: “Treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion that you would your best friends.” That kindness echoes throughout her story, Honouring, and you can join the waitlist to pre-order the book here.

Connecting with Em

If Em’s story resonates, whether you’re navigating grief, thinking about legacy, or wanting to approach life and death with greater compassion, there are several ways to connect with her.

More about her work as a celebrant: http://www.yourcelebrant.life

Reflections and updates on social: https://www.facebook.com/yourcelebrant.life/

Her professional leadership coaching on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emma-melrose/